Is Selling Like Auditioning?
Or are they different things?
The Answers: "NO!" AND "YES!"
I guess there is a reason we're always told to "sell" ourselves when we're auditioning, but it makes you wonder: is the audition process really the same as the sales process? And by extension, is public speaking or any other form of presenting in front of others the same as an actual sales situation?
First, I'd say "No!" because the act of selling and the act of auditioning (or speaking, etc.) are different skill sets and require getting comfortable doing different things. They each necessitate their own tactics and techniques in order to be done effectively.
On the other hand, I'd also say "Yes!" They both require a certain amount of mental fortitude or emotional intelligence, they both involve a lot of the same kinds of mindset challenges, and they both require an ability to be authentically relatable to others. Moreover, the only way you can get better at both is by doing them for real in the real world. And most importantly, it's possible for anyone to get better at both!
And finally, both selling and auditioning (or speaking, etc.) can apply to these words I once heard the late Bob Proctor say:
"You only have to until you want to, and then you don't have to anymore."
The biggest reason many of us tend to not want to do both auditions and sales is they both also involve a LOT of rejection and/or a lot of fear thereof, not to mention all of the other anxieties and psychological challenges everyone at every level can experience in some way or another.
When you go into an audition and you're in a state of fear of failing or you fear they might view you as not good enough, or if you feel like your life is literally dependent on the audition being successful, the intuition of people evaluating you will often lead them to feel like feel like something isn't quite right. So you just might indeed fail no matter how "perfect" the audition may otherwise go.
The same can happen when you're in any sales type of situation. If your job is on the line, or if not making a sale today means an eviction or some other serious financial repercussion tomorrow, the prospective customer or client may likewise intuitively tell if something isn't quite right. The energy you give out may repel them from taking action, even if they cannot not afford to act on your offer or if the results they would achieve are obvious.
When you’re desperate, you stay stuck in your own head worrying about your own needs; you’re not focusing on the needs of the people you’re seeking to serve. So it’s not enough to just say you’re going “man up” and sell or audition anyway. Forbes Robbins Blair, who is an author and a teacher of hypnosis, explains this as “The Law of Reverse Effect” in his book The Manifestation Mindset. He writes, “The harder you consciously try to do something, the more difficult it becomes. It’s because our subconscious mind becomes resistant,” Blair explains, and “The solution is to possess genuine confidence and effortless expectation.”
Rejection hurts!
Rejection is something we often take very personally. Our ability to live is almost always dependent to an extent on our ability to get someone else's approval, whether it's our parents as children, our teachers while in school, or the employers or clients we serve as adults so we can take care of ourselves and even our own children. In fact, because all money comes through people, you actually can't really bring any money into your life if you don't give anyone a valid reason give it to you! Hence, I wrote last month about how most money problems are asking for money problems!
But even when you do all the "right" thinking and have the right mindset for an audition, and even when you know it's nothing more than a lottery-like numbers game beyond your control, the rejection still can hurt. Most of us probably weren't adequately taught how to healthily deal with these inevitable rejections. Most of us were also not taught how to create enough of our own opportunities so we don't have to care about the long odds of many traditional auditions.
Being reminded of those long odds is not much consolation when it feels like you just had a thorough evaluation done on your heart and soul all for nothing, which is close to the truth for many artists, especially for singers, actors, and dancers for whom the "instrument" is almost literally their mind, body, and soul!
Now Open for Business!
After we officially say we're "open" with our new entrepreneurial endeavors, particularly when it’s something not in line with what others already expect us to be doing, we start out by making overtures to people we know and we think might be interested buyers or clients. And we often get a LOT of unexpected rejection right away. It's not always in the form of an outright rejection though. People may respond with things like "Wow, that's wonderful," or "Good for you," or "What an interesting niche!" The latter is my favorite because it almost always comes with a gentle touch of condescension. Many then will ghost us if they didn't manage to change the subject.
This initial rejection is often not actually anything personal, and persistently being of value can help you overcome it. As I’ve heard Bob Proctor and others often say, “We beat resistance with persistence!” And the biggest resistance we have is in our own heads, which is why mindset coaching is vital. A certain amount of rejection is inevitable, but it's hard to not take it personally when it's something unique we created ourselves, especially when we're rejected by some of the very people we may have dreamed of being able to help the most.
In fact, it might even be a bit traumatizing to experience our family, friends, teachers, and others close to us making a clear choice to not want to help us with our business. Particularly when you come from a middle- or working class background, there is almost a sort of unspoken rule that needing any help must mean it's not a good business idea. So a lot of new and ambitious entrepreneurs fail not because they have bad ideas, but because these initial rejections and the lack of support from people close to them can cause them to give up before the right clients or customers even have a chance to know about what's being offered. It helps to remember that clients will become friends faster than friends will become clients!
More No's than Yes's!
Everyone will almost always have more unsuccessful auditions than successful ones, particularly when first starting out. Though they may eventually get to a point to where auditions aren’t as necessary or they can be more selective about what to audition for. Likewise as entrepreneurs, our efforts at making sales will simply have more No's than Yes's when we start out. Yet, when we're first starting out learning to do these activities that depend on how we relate to others in what can often feel like a high-pressure situation, we need a certain amount of positive feedback for the correct things we’re doing. This is the only way we can truly build up our confidence and our beliefs in ourselves and what we have to offer.
So when we’re trying to do our actual real-life sales calls, just like with actual real-life auditions, we’re often not getting enough of the positive feedback we psychologically need right away because it’s almost all No’s. The No's can eat away at our self-esteem and it can become a downward cycle that just makes us feel worse and worse about ourselves and what we’re doing before we decided to just give up. It's no wonder some of my early struggles with selling felt like I was reliving some of my early struggles with auditioning!
This is why sales is one of the highest paying professions in the world, and it’s why I include in my 90-day elite group training opportunities for clients to practice how to lead an empowered sales conversation. Once you learn how to get comfortable doing sales in an empowering, authentic, compassionate way that doesn't trick people into buying for the wrong reasons but simply gets them to clarity on what they want and why they should buy for the right reasons—AND you can remain in integrity with what you're selling— you can start to more easily bring any amount of money you want into your life.
Everyone deserves to become confident at the art of selling and to not be afraid to sell their offerings for what they deserve to be paid. Every business may get more No's than Yes's, but there are still ideal clients for each and every one of us around the world waiting for the opportunity to know about the gifts we're meant to share in order to enhance their lives. We just have to remember to keep on keeping on with asking, searching, and knocking to give those who need us the chance they deserve have their lives transformed.
PS - This is one of my favorite quotes from Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich: "The ability to influence people without irritating them is the most profitable art known to man." When I first heard it, it got me wondering if I was irritating or if I even had any natural ability to influence people! And if something is profitable, does that make it immoral or unethical?
These questions relate to some of the common limiting beliefs and fears so many of us have around money and sales. And they can really trip us up and cause us to struggle as entrepreneurs. This is why I offer my signature 90-day Grow Your Money Voice elite group training. It's designed to be a step-by-step process to helping you confidently start to address these conflicting beliefs, understand your relationship with money, and grow in your ability to confidently sell what you're most meant to offer on the way to your next level—and there's always another level.
Click below to learn more and sign up or DM me if you have any questions and want to talk! The next cohort starts May 21!
